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People make peace as much as Politicians

1009 Views 20 Replies 11 Participants Last post by  Ciberblade
In the late 1980s I spent a weekend in a place called Benwell in the west end of Newcastle (NE England). It's an area recognised by many in relevant organisations as one of the toughest neighbourhoods in the UK. Because I went up there with a friendly demeanour I was made to feel very welcome and had a really enjoyable time. If I had gone up there with an 'attitude' , and/or been judgemental the minute I got off the bus, concidering the sort of place it is, I would probably have lasted about 5 minutes - because the 'attitude' I'd have got back would have been infinately more - erm - 'up front' than anything I'd have been able to carry off. That was 16 years ago, and I sometimes wonder if these days it's possible to be able to do things like that, and does a friendly approach evoke the same, or are we becoming cynical to all that?

Is the world generally becoming an increasingly aggressive place, where competition is all, and being friendly towards people sometimes isn't enough. Is the whole notion of friendliness seen as a strength or a weakness to be exploited these days? People have to work longer hours in the increasingly competitive work place, to pay ever higher mortgages and a bewildering array of credit agreements, and you wonder what sort of effect that's having on societies as a whole, and how societies interact with each other. We live in a high octane culture where the simple day to day use of words can be taken and twisted totally out of common sense parlance by people who seem on a mission to cripple the basis of any peaceful coexistance - spoken communication.

Is this the Neobrutalism, and is it really possible to "Give peace a chance" in the 'get one over on someone else' culture - or are we just trying to grow flowers on a motorway?
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I think Wino is correct that people haven't really become more cynical.

I think it is ALL about how you were raised and how you raise your own children.

My folks taught me to be respectful ALWAYS off the start, and to look at life through a series of opportunities that will either make you a liked person or one who is looked at indifferently or one who is disliked COMPLETELY BASED ON ATTITUDE.

This does not mean that one should go around kissing bunnz all day long or acting overly confident or boastful. Instead the real key is to come across thoughtful and genuinely interested in the feelings which others hold. With that kind of attitude, people feel at ease and are much more willing to explain their thoughts to you accurately rather than telling you what you want to hear.

Confidence is important, but try to never BS your way through an issue. People can see right through BS.

Honesty is critical. Say what you believe, and believe what you say. Do not hold back an apology when you are wrong. And if you make an apology, (this is where I usually blow it) don't try to explain away the mistake. Accept the fact that you were wrong and be genuine and humble.

Golden rule. Treat others in a manner which you would like to be treated.

If all that fails a right cross can be very affective. :D
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